Plan B day – 4 years post suicide attempt and grateful as can be.

When I woke up on 12/12/2010 I was more surprised than anyone. When I “went to sleep” on the 11th it was after almost 1 liter of Maker’s Mark, 98 extra strength Tylenol and all of the anti-depressants I had. So waking up was a surprise.

But I had planned for it. Plan A was to commit suicide, Plan B was to live my life and never look back.

Plan B, what a glorious thing. When I did wake up, I went forward and have not looked back since.

I wish I could help every person that is on that ledge, let them see inside me and understand the possibilities that they have in front of them. That things will most likely get better. I don’t think there is anything anyone could say to me to keep me from making the attempt, but no one had a clue. I made a plan and moved on. I was actually at a party the night before and had a really good time, but no one there knew.

Here I am now, 4 years later. What a difference 4 years make.

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